Day 47---Puma Tennies

I can remember EXACTLY when I bought these shoes, who I was with, and have a very specific weird feeling when I put them on. This already does not sound good, right?

I bought these shoes when I was dating this guy---he shall remain nameless---and this relationship, well, it kind of sucked. These Pumas are super comfy and pretty cute and are just sporty enough for my liking---even though I am realizing as I look at the pictures from today, they are kind of not very clean, I still like them....but I have a hard time wearing them for a couple of reasons. And, if you have ever been in a relationship, and then not been in that relationship, random things/places tend to remind you of that relationship---in both good and bad ways. So, these shoes are like that for me.

1. Each time I tie the laces on these shoes, I can hear his ever so slightly condescending voice telling me how much HE likes these shoes and how I should totally buy them---as if HE had better shoe style than ME...blah blah blah....

2. On the right shoe there is a very distinct coffee stain that did NOT come from ME spilling coffee on my shoe, but instead from HIM spilling coffee on my shoe at a Starbucks and NOT apologizing. Ugh. So, even if I did not associate him with these shoes initially, every time I look down and see that stain, I think of him. (and his lack of apologizing and his stubborn machismo attitude...I'm such a brat, but there is NO way that he reads this, so who cares?)

3. I bought these at the Nordstrom Rack in Long Beach---great store, but I don't like going there, because---you guessed it---it reminds me of our stupid, ridiculous relationship.

Now, these things all might be misinterpreted as me actually thinking about him, caring about him, or still being under the spell of our relationship, but it is quite the opposite. When we broke up, I never spoke one more word to him again. Seriously. Not one word. Never have even seen him in like 3 years. The End. I move on. That is why these shoes are so frustrating: because no matter what, when I put them on, I associate them with him. I can't help it. I don't spend any time thinking about him and I sometimes forget that I was ever even in a relationship with him (how sad, right?) BUT HOWEVER, when I wear these shoes (on the rare occasions that it actually happens!) I see his face for at least a split second and experience this inner questioning of "Why did I date him?" Bet you never thought shoes could tell you all of that, huh?

Any male readers are currently thinking to themselves "Women are crazy" and my ladies are thinking "Hmmmm....I have some things in my wardrobe/life that remind me of a former relationship." Why do we hold on to this stuff? What am I hoping to glean from these possessions? I am thinking that maybe I should just get rid of these shoes. I obviously have a negative association with them---but unfortunately I actually like these shoes. What's a girl to do? Continue to wear them and be haunted by this past relationship? OR, perhaps invest in a new pair of cute, sporty tennies that are free of ghosts? I'm thinking probably these are going to be a part of the "shoe funeral" that is going to take place in about a week.

Weird.

P.S. A BIG SPECIAL THANKS TO KAREN, my photographer, FOR BEING SO CREATIVE OVER THESE PAST 47 DAYS! LOVE THE SHOE PIC TODAY! (we are in the midst of standardized state testing, and I made these papers for my kids and got pencils made for them to use during the test to try and encourage them! Fun times!)